These mailing lists I find myself upon
Confound me more and more. Did I subscribe
To endtimesprepper, toenailfungusgone,
thethriftybuddha, russianwinesimbibe,
And lonelysingleladies? Did I seek
newpatriotresistanceusa,
tryfreeviagra, membersonlypeek,
Or reikimeditationsdaybyday?
I send these now to Junk--that's not so hard--
Before my Inbox gets completely full.
Goodbye, thesetrickswillsaveonmastercard
And undiscoveredstocktoridethebull.
So long, greatbonustravelpointsabroad,
adealaweekforseniors, iphonehack,
mysugardaddy, fedinsurancefraud,
stopspam – Oh nuts, I need that last one back!